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A cautionary tale indicating that some people should NEVER own a computer!
Angry Daddy
I work in a call center where we do technical support on computers and peripherals.
I don't take calls anymore (thank God) but when someone gets a customer who is being abusive or threatening, they can press a button that will send a recording of the call to someone with some sort of authority in case we're legally implicated.This is the transcript of an incomplete call that got recorded.
[very young child screaming/sobbing in background]
Agent: Look sir, if you damage the computer on purpose like that, your warranty doesn't cover it. That, in conjunction with the fact that your computer is too old to be covered under the warranty, means there's nothing I can do.
Customer: I smashed it with a hammer.
Woman in background: Tell them to come pick it up!
Customer: Now someone has to come pick it up. And fix it.
Agent: I'm sorry, sir, there's nothing I can do for the computer if you've destroyed it like that. It's not covered under your warranty, plus it's beyond the warranty period.
Customer: It's under the warranty because I'm going to bring it back to the store. And they're gonna give me my money back.
Agent: You're more than welcome to talk to the store and find out what options they have available.
Customer: Yeah.
[child sobs]
Woman in background: I told you not to do it while he was watching!
Customer: [to her] I didn't know he was watching! [to agent] Well, there's one other-- that was the printer I smashed. That, I just bought. I just bought that, uh, two weeks ago online. That's gone. Now, I'm sick of this shit, somebody's gotta fix this.
Agent: Okay, so right now is the printer destroyed?
Customer: [maniacally] It's all smashed up!
Agent: If your printer's destroyed, how can I do any sort of troubleshooting on it?
Customer: You guys aren't doing shit for me! You keep telling me it's the software program!
Agent: Before you smashed the printer, it looked like the problem was, indeed, between your computer and the software program. Unfortunately, we can't test that anymore.
Customer: There's nothing wrong with the software program! What don't you understand? I put a new one in there! You know what? I'm gonna-- I got something to do with this-- this monitor!
[sound of object being hit repeatedly]
Customer: [Hardware Brand] piece of crap! [pause] There! Now nothing's working for anybody!
[more whacking sounds]
Customer: Hello! [yelling] Sir!
Agent: Yes, I'm still here. [stalling] I'm going to need to ask you to calm down, because if you don't calm down, there's nothing I'm going to be able to do for you. We need to keep this call on a professional level.
Customer: [calmly] Yes. Yes, we do. You're very right. Well, there's nothing you can do now.
Agent: Well, if your monitor's [whacking sounds begin again while agent is speaking] broken, there's not much I can do right at this point.
[whacking sounds stop]
Customer: Well, I guess I lost my temper. I've been up for-- for three days.
Agent: Mm-hmm.
Customer: [voice cracks] Trying to-- trying to fix this problem. And I just lost it, I guess. I'm sorry.
Agent: Okay, I mean, right now, uh, right now there would be some steps I could try running through--
Customer: That's not going to work, there's glass all over the place.
Agent: Okay--
Customer: There's glass everywhere. I always wondered what was inside one of those. Didja ever wonder what was inside one of these units?
Agent: Actually, I've taken them apart so I do know what's inside them, yes.
Customer: [begins sobbing] I can't believe I did this.
Woman in background: Oh, my God. Are you crying?
Customer: This is costing me a lot of money and time.
Woman in background: Just tell them to send someone to come get it and bring us a new one. We'll be waiting. [yelling] We don't have garbage service so you better come get it!
Customer: [to her] We'll just take it back to the store and see if we can get our money back.
Agent: Okay, so you want to take it back to the store?
Customer: Well, what are my options?
Agent: Well, at this point, if we're going to be doing any more troubleshooting, we're going to need a monitor we can troubleshoot with. Right now there's not a whole lot more that we can do. You're more than welcome to go back to the store and see what options they have available, but right now there's not a lot more that I can do right at this point in time until we have a monitor that we can work with.
Customer: [to child] Hey, don't walk there, you're gonna get cut! [to woman] Come and get him before he hurts himself! [to agent] There's glass everywhere.
Agent: Would you like to give us a call back at a more convenient time?
Customer: Will somebody come and take care of this?
Agent: Unfortunately there's nothing we can do to send someone out to do anything. It's not covered under the warranty you had.
Customer: What do you mean? We just bought this thing. A month ago. And the computer we bought in the summertime.
Agent: The computer is a [model number], correct?
Customer: I have no idea what it is, it's a computer. If that's what it is, that's what it is. We just bought it. In August. Or the beginning of the summer.
Agent: From the records we have here, it shows that the computer is more than a year old. If there is any question about the warranty with the printer, you'd need to contact the printer manufacturer.
Customer: Now, listen here! I'm just going to take this shit back to the store, and they're just going to have to give me the money, that's all.
Agent: Okay, now if--
Customer: It's your fault I went-- I went psycho like this.
Agent: Okay, if you want-- I mean, you're more than welcome to do that--
Customer: And they're going to have to pay for some treatment too.
Agent: You're more than welcome to contact--
[child hollering in background]
Customer: I want some kind of-- some kind of treatment. Because it made me crazy, it made me go crazy, talking to you people. Now, what-- what are you going to do?
Agent: Well, right now there's not much that I-- there's not much that I can do, we, in order for me--
Customer: Now, I won't be satisfied until-- somebody get out here, clean this mess up, bring me a new computer and a new printer, and just somebody to calm me down!
Agent: Okay, right now there's nothing I can do to send somebody down there with another computer because it's-- I mean, you're-- I mean, the computer is out of warranty in our database right now,
Child in background: [screaming] Mamma! Mamma! Maaaaaaaammaaaaa!
Customer: [screaming] It's not out of warranty, you're full of it! You're full of it! You're full of it! Good bye! I can't take this shit anymore, I can't take it!
*click*